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The JN Editorial

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How to Write an Editorial for Newbies
Published: November 26, 2011

You poke your head inside the Editorial Room, where Summra and Mika already have How to Write an Editorial for Newbies wide open on the desk.

Summra jumps up and down with glee. "This is so exciting, I can't wait to get started!"

Nodding, Mika replies, "I agree, but we need to know what we're doing before that happens." He then reads aloud from the book.

Introduction. So, you have decided to write an editorial. Congratulations on taking the first crucial step and opening this book! The hard part is over; you have already sold your soul to Dave, and now you have chosen to put your employment with Jellyneo to good use by helping your fellow Neopians in their quest for knowledge! Just follow the steps provided in this guide, and you will move on to editorial greatness!

Step 1:
This should be obvious; find some questions that need answering! You will find them conveniently located in the mailbox attached to the Editorial Room. WARNING: Do not, under any circumstances, stand in front of the mailbox upon opening. You will understand.

As Mika puzzles over the warning, Summra proceeds to do exactly what the book said not to do. "What can possibly go- AHHHHH!!" A massive pile of mail cascading from the (rather small) mailbox buries her, preventing her from finishing the statement. Picking a letter off the top of the pile, Mika looks at the first question.

What is the reference behind the Book Of Awesome item, anyway? ~ fire_star_child
Mika: Je suis certain de ma réponse. Ce livre a un rapport avec le fameux Monde de Gelée et il donne, à qui le lit, les preuves prouvant son existance et...

Summra: ... What? ¡No comprende! *grabs the book*

Step 2:
Now that you have your questions, you need to answer them. What, were you expecting to publish a list of questions for your readers to ponder? Leave that to the Lenny Conundrum! You also need to make sure everyone can understand your answer, or, again, it is useless.

Mika: Oops...

Summra: I think what he's trying to say is the book refers to an Internet meme that went viral during the Krawk Island reconstruction. If you look at the book's description, it asks, "What wont Gavril hold up next?" The meme continues to answer that very question.

Hi JN! *throws jelly* Yummy! On to the question... What is the Shop of Offers? ~ Pottingmix
Mika: *reads the warning on the first page* ATTENTION: You might be hit by some flying obj- Hey, where did this jelly come from?!?

Well, the Shop of Offers can be considered as a daily, since you can find the Rich Slorg event. You receive either 50NP or 100NP, so don't visit it on your side account(s). Back in the old days, you could answer surveys or view some advertisements for Neopoints as well, but those have mostly been removed.

I have a paper petpet with one of my pets. Since the paper petpets are supposed to be no-trade and are otherwise protected, can they be eaten when you visit the Turmaculus? ~ minidriver
Summra: Turmy does not discriminate on whether or not a pet is no-trade. Therefore, if you choose to present that poor defenseless creature to him, he will not think twice about eating cardboard if he's that hungry. :(

I was wondering about the Pygui - it is such a cute petpet and I'd love to have one. The Item DB says it can be obtained from the Lunar Temple. Is that true, is it a very rare prize? Has it been confirmed by anybody? Because you have not added it yet to the prize list on the Lunar Temple guide. ~ Maliechen89
Mika: That's a good question. Well, the Pygui has been added to the Lunar Temple guide for a while now. As for you trying to get one, you just have to keep trying; Pygui are as rare as the Lunar Cape. I hope you get lucky one day.

Now, what's the next step...

Step 3:
Don't forget - to keep the reader's attention, you need to break the wall o' text with some fun pictures! Even the most boring of textbooks are bearable with a graphic or two, so editorials spill over with glee once this criteria is met.

Are the two of you twins? If not, you really should think about it. Anyways, have you ever thought about even the slightest possibility of including approximate trading value for Neocash items in the Item DB? ~ anoniimouse
Summra: Let's take care of business first. After a quick talk with Ian and Illy, the verdict on NC trading values is a "no." NC trading is largely based on something called "cap value," which means the price of a mystery capsule (usually a gift box mystery capsule). This equals 200 NC to 250 NC. The problem is that trading is highly subjective and highly volatile. If someone is willing to trade a large NC amount for something, suddenly the value of the item becomes askew as other traders try to match the price. Not to mention re-released capsule prizes that can shake the system even more.

Mika: Basically, the whole endeavour would be an extremely frustrating process to carry out. There have been cases of NC users coming under fire for trying to maintain value guides. The intent of the guides was to serve as a guideline, but scores of people took the prices as absolute truth. So, while this addition has been considered, we feel that our efforts would only be perceived negatively - that is, people would claim we are attempting to manipulate the market or do not update the prices fast enough.

Summra: As for the twins part, we technically are not. But we talked it over, and we enjoy the idea. So I drew a picture to celebrate! :O

Summra and Mika, the Official Unofficial IDBer Twins!

Summra: *looks at book* This counts as an image... right?

Mika: I'm sure Rosie has her job secured...

I zapped my Shadow Xweetok the other day and it said its colour changed to Shadow. How is that humanly possible? ~ anonymous
Mika: I guess you now have a Shadow Shadow Xweetok, congratulations! When you visit the Lab Ray, it does not take notice of what species/colour your Neopet currently is, so there is always a tiny chance that your pet will be zapped to the same species/colour. It really can be frustrating sometimes.

On your birthday, Neopets shows it is your birthday with the site theme. So, your birthday is displayed for all to see. How is this going to help with the extra security? ~ SmokinIrish69
Summra: I think you might be slightly confused. If you look at your user lookup, the only date that Neopets shows permanently is the day you started playing the game on that account, not your birthday. So, as long as you keep your birthday private, you have that extra level of security. Also, you are the only one who can view the Happy Birthday site theme when it is your birthday. Yay!

I have a question about the Golden Dubloon. I read somewhere that to maximise the chance of my pet taking some leftovers home, I should find the smallest Neopet and make them as bloated as possible. But then I also read from other guides that it's completely random whether I get food or not, and all that feeding/size doesn't change the chance. So...is it random? ~ anonymous
Mika: Ah, the Golden Dubloon. Great memories, great meals, awesome food. *flips through index pages* For more information, check Gourmet Food.

Currently, there is no proof about your theory (of course, if you can prove it, tell us!). For now, we assume it lets you take leftovers randomly. The best way is to buy the cheapest foods; we have the menu right here for you. If you do leave with leftovers, keep in mind that they are gourmet, so it is a good thing. Also, with the Anchor Management daily, you have more chances of getting dubloons. The more dubloons, the more opportunities to dine, so keep trying!

I put my pet in the JN Pet Directory, then took it out. I tried to put it back in but it said it was already there. When I looked it up, it said the pet wasn't there! What happened? ~ crusaderofchaos
Summra: As you can see on the opt-out form, in big shiny red letters, the choice to take your pet out of the directory is permanent. Therefore, you will be barred from adding that same pet again. I presume this mechanism is in place so people who have their pet unwillingly added can keep them out after they remove them the first time.

If you would really like to have your pet re-added, there are instructions on the opt-out page.

Hey, I haven't played Neopet's Facebook game (Treasure Keepers) for a few months, but logged in to play today. There have been a lot of changes, and now I can't find the Haggle button! It used to be you just clicked on the item and checked Haggle, but I just can't figure out how to do it now. Please help! Thanks! ~ anonymous
Summra: *thumbs through index* Treasure Keepers... Treasure Keepers... Ah, okay, page 394! *flips to page*

Sadly, the haggle button bit the dust during your hiatus. All items not on a display shelf or "friends only" table are now eligible for haggling, whether their price is 5 gold or 900 gold. The only way to know when an item is up for haggling now is to see the button pop up upon a purchase. No regulation, all spontaneous.

If you have any more questions about updates in Treasure Keepers, you can visit our lovely guide!

Can you complete the Forgotten Shore Map more than once? Will it increase the chance of getting an item? ~ xhriis
Mika: The Forgotten Shore Map is very similar to the Secret Laboratory Map and the Petpet Laboratory Map. Once you've completed it, you won't be able to turn it in again. There is no other way to increase your chances, you just need to be lucky.

Hey, Summra, what's the next step?

Summra: Not sure... *turns page* Oooh, I like this one!

Step 4:
Not all questions need to be answered bluntly - historical storytelling is a great way to break the pattern!

Are there any other species and colour combinations, aside from the Ice Bori, that cannot be obtained through the Lab Ray, Rainbow Fountain, paint brushes, morphing potions, etc.? ~ Ray
Summra: Nope! The Ice Bori remains the most unique pet in Neopia, only available through this toolbar promotion. The Ice Bori came into Neopia this way as a special incentive; during the promotion, the Bori were a new species to Neopia, introduced through the Hannah and the Ice Caves plot going on during the time. The Neopets Team believed a good way to attract people to download the toolbar would be by offering an exclusive Neopet.

The Lutari used to share the title of exclusive Neopet when the Neopets Mobile promotion was active, but has since become a Limited Edition Pet, creatable on its pet day.

On the Neopets calendar, why is March called the month of Running, April called the month of Eating, and May called the month of Hunting? ~ tchanliao
Mika: YAY, it's time for some Neopian history.

The Neopian Calendar appeared on February 29th, 2000 and has since been expanded to include theme days as well as days for the newer pet species. As for the name of each month, there is no certitude, only theories. For example, March is the first month of spring, so people are going outside after a long winter and enjoying the return of good weather. Another theory is that after awakening from hibernation, you need to start getting in shape. April is the month of Cybunnies and Easter treats, and May is the month of Lupes, who are effective hunters.

Since there is no right theory, you can come up with your own. Maybe it has something to do with the 12 heroes of Altador, or it can even have no logic at all.

Do you know how often Neopets does name purging? There's a pet name that I would love to have, taken by an owner who hasn't been seen in a "very very long time" and I'd like the chance to claim it. I asked in the Neopian Times editorial and of course, no answer there. Any help here would be fantastic, thanks. :) ~ peroxwhy_gen
Summra: According to Neopets' Terms and Conditions, to be considered for a name purge, an account must be inactive for at least eighteen months. After that, it's up to TNT to run the program, and there is no predictor for that. (If you do not want to read through the long legal version, you can look at our lovely account purges guide.)

You should look at the long legal version anyway, or else Lawyerbot might throw a tantrum. :(

Why is it that on some days, you can see a notice above the news reading, "Remember to check on today's Weather Forecast"? ~ amw1997_aa
Mika: Well, you should always be aware of the weather before taking your Neopet outside. No reason to take your raincoat if it's warm and sunny outside.

Okay, actually, that sentence will appear randomly to you when checking the New Features page, regardless of the date, the time, or the weather!

How many backgrounds don't have the word background in them? (For example: River Overlook.) ~ anonymous
Summra: Well, to begin with, we have six Neopoint-purchasable backgrounds: Simple Wooden Stage, Sparkling Icy Winterscape, Spooky Tower Entrance, Starry Night in Neopia, River Overlook, and Idyllic Nature Scene.

Mika: As for NC Mall backgrounds, eight others exist: Shenkuu Warrior Training Grounds, Clock Makers Workshop, Lost Desert Treasure Room, Golden Sarcophagus, Lifeguard Station, MME10-S4: Neohome For Sale, Roo Island Toy Merry Go Round, and Sweetheart Gram Dressing Room. Unfortunately, only the first two are still available to purchase from the NC Mall.

Technically, Space Trooper Oxygen Tank can also be included, as it occupies the background zone for Jubjubs only.

So that makes a grand total of fourteen (or fifteen if you count the oxygen tank)!

Yeah, that's right, we're special!

Summra: Huh, I thought the next step would be a given...

Step 5:
No matter how funny the results might be, you are
not allowed to supply false information. Think of those poor Baby Neopets... you don't want them hurt because of something you said, right?

Sometimes, in Korbats Lab, when you press spacebar, the ball changes its direction. Why? Should I notify TNT? ~ megamorpho
Mika: No need to notify The Neopets Team, you have found the super duper secret button that controls all the balls in Neopia. The next thing to do is to create a master plan to enslave everyone in the world. Muahaha!

*crickets chirp* Not believable? Okay, here's the real answer:

It doesn't happen all the time, only when the candle flame flickers purple. If you press spacebar then, the ball will immediately change its direction. To learn more about this game, just check Jellyneo's awesome Korbats Lab guide.

I was using your Avatar Checklist (which is totally useful by the way) and noticed that I didn't have the "Bori-Grumpy" avatar, so I started clicking on plushie Bori in the Pet Directory. Luckily, on my second click, I got the avatar! However, the Bori whose lookup I had visited had full hit points, but was suffering from Neoblues. Was this a glitch, or can you also get the avatar from a Bori who is sick? ~ aklwildwolf8
Summra: After testing, it appears your newly discovered theory is correct. The method of 0 HP or sickness will grant you the avatar. Lucky for you, terrible for the Bori. :(

Mika: You thought that last step was painfully obvious, look at this one:

Step 6:
Now you have the bulk of the editorial done. You are almost there! However, a critical part of the process is still missing - editing. As stated before, your job is to answer questions coherently. This is best accomplished if you leave the 1337 4w50m3n355 at the door.

I had a pet that was almost done with NeoQuest I. But then I transferred him to a side account. Will his score on NeoQuest still be there, or would it restart? Thanks! ~ socergrrl
Summra: no, JooR pe7 W1LL 8E jUS7 f1Ne 8E7wEEN 4CcOUN72 l0l!

Mika: *glare*

Summra: Hehe, he, he... I'll answer normally...

NeoQuest games are tied to the Neopet, not to the account. Therefore, transferring your NeoQuest-playing pet to a side should be fine, so long as you transfer the pet back to your main account before playing NeoQuest with him or her again. The only time a NeoQuest game will be deleted will be when it remains untouched for a year or more. However, don't try this with NeoQuest II - that game is not tied to the pet.

Sorry if I hurt your eyes with the first answer... *hides in box*

What is the highest estimated value any given item has? And since there's no way to search the Item DB by estimated value, could you have Ian make it so that you can? Ian might not be able to, but I figured I'd ask, since my name is Ian, too. ~ lostdesert4thecup
Mika: After a quick word with our Great Master Ian, I have an answer. The item with the highest estimated value that stocks in the main Neopian shops is the Chilli Chucks. However, since the estimated prices TNT provide are extremely varied and rarely reflect the true price, we will not be adding that search feature.

Hidden Tower items are usually spot on with their estimated price. However, they represent a very small percentage of items in Neopia.

Summra: Are we almost done?! D:

Mika: I think you have just one more question... let's go!

I was in the Battledome recently, and I noticed that my Jubjub had some new abilities: Jubjub Scream and Jubjub BAM. I'm sure it didn't have these before, and I suspect that they're related to the level of my pet. Do you have a page for these abilities, and how they are gained? ~ anonymous
Summra: You are right in saying the abilities are related to level, because they are indeed higher-level pet-specific abilities. Good job on leveling! However, we do not have a page cataloguing those abilities... yet. ;)

Okay, we're done now, right? *reads from book*

Step 7:
And, ta-da! Your shiny new editorial is complete! Please proceed to the proper publishing location for further instruction. I hope this guide has helped you successfully through your first editorial experience. Happy writing!

Mika: *cheers* Come on, let's go to the publication room and get this to the press!

Summra: Agreed. Everyone's going to be so surprised at how awesome this is!

You watch the two staffers run out the door, but before you get a chance to follow them, you notice something on the floor of the editorial room. Upon closer investigation, the object is a forgotten question, still in its envelope. You sigh as you slip it back into the mailbox for next week. It was their first attempt; they can't be perfect, right? Besides, they did a pretty good job as it is - let them have their moment of editorial glory.

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