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The JN Editorial

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Podcasts Have Consequences
Published: September 21, 2013


Angry Yurble Clearing Up

You kids just think you can go around having 200th editorial issues whenever you feel like it, don't you? Yes, you do! And never a thought to what happens afterwards. Now we've got data-ma-bits and Flash-um-a-bobs all over the place, and who has to clear them up? ME, that's who.

Well, don't just stand there! If you're going to loiter around here gawking, you can pick up that feather duster and start on those poor, poor bookcases over there. And hand me that dustpan and brush. If I'm not mistaken, I just spotted a QUESTION sticking out from under the rug. Someone hasn't even bothered to pick all of those up. Can you believe it?!

Hmmm, let's see, what does it say...

*shifty eyes* Do you guys know of another way to submit a ticket on Neopets when all you get is... Page Expired To protect privacy and enhance security, the page you are trying to access is no longer available...when you click the help page??? ~ slipslippy
Apparently, the help page needs help now. What is the world coming to? It's been acting up for several weeks now, from what I've been hearing. I suspect Meepits in the pipes, I do. Shifty little devils.

Anyhow, I should probably answer this person, since it doesn't look like I can get the question to disappear any other way. So, if you're listening, you should try using a different browser, or a friend's computer. Most of the time, the blasted page is at least functioning half-correctly for somebody. I know that's not much of a comfort, but until the Meepits get chased off somewhere else, it's about all there is to be done.

Right, back to work. Oh, for... Why are there Key Quest keys hanging off ALL of the coat hooks? Who thought it was a good idea to stick helium balloons to the ceiling? And is that another question under the Content Beast statue?

Hello Jellyneo :) It's been awhile since I played Neopets and I'm just returning. I forget a lot of things I used to know - I used to call myself a Neopets knowledge "master" x3 - so I was wondering if the symbols in the game Spellseeker have a meaning or not? I'm really fond of this game so I got thinking about that. What do they meaning, if they even have one? ~ rsg1901
Those are codestone symbols. You know, those engraved rocks that wobble all the time and are a real pain if you drop them on your paw. That martial artist Techo on Mystery Island says the symbols have a meaning, but it's too mystical for normal pets and people like you and me to understand. Personally, I think he's making the whole thing up.

Orn CodestoneTai-Kai CodestoneZei Codestone
Whoever keeps shaking those rocks, STOP IT! My eyes are going funny!

Dear TJNT, I was wondering about something in regards to assessing the value of pets for trading purposes. Throughout the years, Neopets has produced a small population of pets with glitched attributes. A few that I've seen before are negative stats, illegal characters in the name (for example, *, @, & or spaces) and possessing an object as a petpet. When assessing the value of such a pet for trade, are such glitches something that are okay to factor in? Or is it okay for certain glitches, but not others? Or would all of this qualify as glitch abuse? I know it is extemely unlikely that pets such as these would ever surface for trade, so I'm just asking out of curiousity. ~ sonicsega
Let the trader beware, I'd say, and apparently the Neopets Team would agree with me. They've stated in the past that you're the only one responsible for any "value" you care to put on even temporary glitches when trading pets. Just remember, if the glitch isn't in something permanent like the Neopet's name, there's always a chance that one of these days the programmers will get off their plush programmer sofas and come and fix it, and you won't be eligible for any kind of compensation handout. (Of course they have plush programmer sofas. Why wouldn't they?) And the Darkest Faerie only knows what might happen if you try to transfer or disown Neopets with special characters in their names, since some of the links in the process are name-based. It might not be pretty.

Hey TJNT, I have a question about side accounts. I have two old side accounts that I can no longer access (really old ones too, like 9 year old accounts *sob*) because I don't have the date of birth and the email address attached to them has been disabled. These accounts still have some of my information (such as, on the userlookup, it identifies my main account and such). Since I can no longer use these accounts, is it okay for me to create new sides, or do I have to wait for them to be purged? ~ Sonicsega
If you have no way of getting the accounts back, you can go ahead and make some new ones. The spirit of the rules is supposed to be that you access the site on no more than five accounts at a time, so making replacements for permanently locked ones is acceptable. And take better care of them this time! We don't want to be up to all our ears in discarded accounts until the next purge, here.

Cobwebbed Shelf
Old houses full of cobwebs probably seem very romantic when you're not the one dusting them.

Hey TJNT! *throws and throws and throws jelly* I want to know: is it true that Kanrik and Hannah are MARRIED?? If yes, they look pretty good together... And what is the NeoSchool? Apparently it was years ago but I didn't start playing that far back ago. Thanks! :) PS: That Kiko is soooo adorable! Can I have him? ~ Anonymous
Personal questions, now, is it? Well, I don't normally run around asking pets their marital status, particularly if they're tall shadowy thieves with a dark and troubled past and a proven lack of scruples and REALLY POINTY DAGGERS, did you notice those?

It did look like those two ne'er-do-wells got themselves married during the Curse of Maraqua plot, but it might have just been a pair of loony cosplayers taking the whole 'theming' idea much too far. With only one confirmed picture of the wedding in question, nobody can say for sure, and I'm not sticking my neck out. It's not like Yurbles even HAVE much of a neck to speak of.

As for Neoschool, it was some half-completed scheme to get Neopets indoors reading about science and history instead of gallivanting around solving ancient tomb locks and recording podcasts and Fyora knows what else. It was never opened to the public, so I don't know what would have gone on in there. You can read about the plans here, if you haven't anything better to do.

Dear Jellyneo, say if I were to use a "Draik Transmogrification Potion", would it reset my pet's stats, like its Strength, Defense, Hit Points, Level Etc.? Thanks!! ~ Legogolfer
No, your pet's stats would stay the same as before. If he or she has some strong thwacking muscles now, then they're not going anywhere even with Draik wings attached. Hmmm, maybe I should turn into a Draik for a bit to dust the cobwebs off the ceiling.

Angry Draik
Leave those books alone, or you'll be a walking ball of fire...
no secret knowledge of Moltara required!

I have taken a look around Jellyneo and I have found very little data on the BOSS button for premium members. Is it still available? Details, people! ~ a0r10n
Oh, that thing that used to put a big fake graph on the screen if you thought someone was going to look over your shoulder? There's no sign of that button anywhere at the moment, and good riddance. Pushing buttons in a hurry never leads to anything good. Now, if only somebody had taught that lesson to those staffers, Lunk and Rascal, or whatever they call themselves, I wouldn't still be extracting popcorn-on-a-string from the laser printer.

Hello, lovely Jellyneo staff members! I know that there are food items that can make your pets short and heavy, but are there foods that can make your pet tall and skinny? I want to have a Zafara that is my height. Thanks! ~ anonymous
I don't think there's any item in Neopia that does either of those things, at least, not one that's been recorded to date. As you mention, the BBQ Porkwich may make your pet heavier, but right now there's no food that will magically make him or her lighter, and a good job too. It's bad enough getting Spyders off the ceiling without bringing down 0lb gravity-defying Neopets, too. There might be something like that out there that'll be released to buy in the future, mind you, given the appearance of some of those plot protagonists. That Clara Chatham looks positively ill.

Hello to my favorite group-of-people-who-tell-me-tips-about-Neopets! *holds out a kitten to pet and cuddle* I starting getting back into playing Neoquest recently (so addicting!), and I was thinking one night whilst falling asleep - NEOQUEST PAINTBRUSH. I wanted to ask if y'all think that's a cool idea, or if I'm just crazy. Which is possible. *pets kitten* ~ devpup
Most of those adventuring whippersnappers don't have a particularly unusual build or colour -- they're white Lupes, blue Acaras, what-have-you. It's their clothes that set them apart, and there's no need to make a special paintbrush for something that could fit on a coathanger. Who knows, maybe they'll release some Neoquest-themed outfits on a random theme day and you can all run around pretending to be fighting the Dragonywhatsit of Pointlessness, or whatever it is Neoquest pets do instead of a proper day's work.

Neoquest Archer
And if you tell anybody about my petting the kitten there will be trouble.

When Baby Elephante does not wear clothes it shows its diaper. Why? ~ P2park
Are you saying you want to have a baby crawling around with its undergarments taken off?! ARE YOU INSANE? There's a reason those things are pinned and taped on!

Looking at that little brat in the Customisation Wardrobe, though, taking its clothes off does seem to leave it with a bare bottom. So I'm not sure what you're talking about here. There is some sort of clothing in a lot of official artwork and pre-Y9 poses, but for the moment it seems to have gone missing. Fyora help us all.

So while wondering through some forums on Neopets related sites, I stumbled across a rather depressing thread about the future of Neopets. Basically what the poster explained is that Neopets is in danger of being shut down because of the loss of players over the years, starting with it's purchase from Viacom in 2005. The poster then went on to say that the number of active players has been going lower and lower, to the point that there are hardly 15k people on at one time. So my questions are this, is Neo in danger? What exactly is the number of active players, and should I be worried? Thank you for your time, with regards, X ~ Anonymous
Aargh, as if all this podcast nonsense wasn't enough, now we have to deal with conspiracy theorists, too? What a day.

Look, this kind of scaremongering has been happening for years. There were people running around like headless chickens, blethering about the end of Neopia, back when I first got my janitor's job in Altador in Year Eight -- that is, seven years ago. And in case you managed to miss the fact, our world is still right here, still spinning, and still in need of someone to clean it, so look handy with that feather duster.

Banner ads in places they didn't use to be, odd decisions by the Neopets Team, glitches, lag, too much maintenance, not enough maintenance, too much hype getting poured into merchandise, certain countries no longer being able to buy merchandise, a quiet few months in the news -- look, no matter what year it is or what's happening, if someone wants to believe that the end of the world is around the corner, there will always be something that looks enough like evidence. The fact is, nobody really knows what the future's going to hold. But the people in charge seem to think that the end isn't immediately nigh, and frankly, that's good enough for me.

Yurble Wielding Mop
Now let's hope those doom-sayers put a sock in it pretty soon,
or else I can see a large floor mop to the face in their very near future.

Hello, Jellyneo! Which came first, grumpy cat or Plumpy? ~ anonymous
I don't know what all these furballs have to be grumpy about. I've never seen anyone tell an Angelpuss to recatalogue a filing system. Anyhow, I'm told that the original Grumpy Cat (who goes by the completely absurd name of Tardar Sauce) was unleashed on the Internet in the autumn of last year (Y14), while the first-ever Plumpy was released during that year's Advent Calendar. So it looks like the non-Neopian version came first.

My brother has stopped playing Neopets and is giving his stuff to me. I want to keep his pets on his account and turn it into a side, but he has a Habitarium... can I still make it a side account or would TNT freeze me? (I wouldn't use it) ~ anonymous
You can't use somebody else's account, whether it's got a Habitarium on it or not. Accounts are meant for their creators to use, not anybody else! Can you imagine how much chaos there would be if everyone was wandering in and out of each other's accounts all day long? It's not surprising TNT have made it against the rules to share or give away accounts. If you want your brother's Neopets, he'll have to drop them off at the transfer station for you to pick up on your account.

*adjust over-sized glasses and waves* H-hello. Its my first time submitting these and I hope to have this (and more) burning question answered in the near future. OK! Here it goes! If a converted Mutant Draik is painted Tyrannian, does an option appear to either convert or not to the new art style? ~ dr_taboo
Yurble: Who let you and your muddy hooves in here?! Anyhow, he's right. The only pets that now use the old, pre-Y9 art style are a handful of stragglers who were around before the revamp and whose owners still haven't updated them. When you paint a pet, you get the current, dressable form. Doesn't matter whether the pet you're painting started out converted, unconverted, Mutant, Maraquan, Meepit-shade-of-pink, or neon with chartreuse polka dots. S/he is getting a new paint job, so to the current form of the new colour s/he shall go. And yes, this counts for zapping a pet with the Lab Ray or using a morphing potion, too. There's no item that'll throw your pet back into an outdated art style (unless you count 8-bit, I suppose).

History Book

For Fyora's sake! WHY, why in Meepits' name did those staffers ask the listeners to send them dung?! WHY WOULD YOU EVER DO THAT? As soon as I'm done with this room, I'm going to find that Dave fellow and make him promise that nothing like this will ever happen agai--

Hi, TJNT! *Hands baskets of birthday cake* Say I was reading the editorial. I might have happened to see that the last issue was issue 199. Say that even with my brain on summer mode (that means all traces of math leave) I managed to figure out that the next issue was issue 200. Let's pretend that this 'issue 200' is going to come out around the day that Jellyneo turns nine. (Wow, that's old.) I just wanted to congratulate you on 200 great editorials and nine years of helping Neopets players on the site. May Jellyneo never shut down. ~ flames_unleashed
Well... thanks for your good wishes. I suppose 200th issues aren't completely bad, after all.

But next time they have one, would it kill them to hold it in a nice quiet closet or something? In the dark? Sitting on their hands with gobstoppers in all their mouths? I don't ask for much.